All that is gold does not glitter,
Not all those who wander are lost;
The old that is strong does not wither,
Deep roots are not reached by the frost.
-J.R.R. Tolkien
For the last six years, I’ve chosen a word or theme for the year. They’ve guided me better than any previous resolutions ever did and helped me accomplish goals and be closer to the person I want to be while allowing for self-compassion and flexibility. I wrote about choosing a word of your own earlier this week and yesterday I did my reflection for my word of 2020, Strength.
This year my word is Roots.
Some years I’ve known my word for weeks approaching the new year, but this year was tough for me. It wasn’t until I spent focused time journaling last weekend that what I wanted my 2021 to look like started to clarify.
I reflected on how I wanted to keep running and aim for a marathon. I wrote about writing a new manuscript and keeping up the rhythm of my current routines to meditate and create every day. I want to explore Door County, my new home, and make new connections locally while investing in my current relationships with my family and friends.
I want to do more strength training, drink less, and rebalance my book to fanfiction ratio. I want to bring my best to my job and feel proud of my work while staying balanced. I want to grow my financial savings to prepare for a future that hopefully includes children. I want to be a good friend, appreciate my home, help my mom’s nonprofit, have fun, laugh . . .
I searched for the connection. I didn’t want to repeat past years, but I’ve benefited from their routines in a way I wanted to recapture after all the changes in 2020. I wanted a version of my past productiveness and happiness that fit who and where I am now.
I asked myself how I wanted to feel and wrote: grateful, strong, energetic, resilient, connected, warm, loved, proud, creative, purposeful, in love with who I am, balanced, rested, ready.
While I was journaling I was listening to Taylor Swift’s Evermore and a lyric from the song “Ivy” jumped out at me: I can’t stop you putting roots in my dreamland. The word “roots” felt like it was screaming at me so I scribbled it down in my notebook margins to revisit.
I toyed with a couple of other words for this year: Foundation, Connect, Present, Purpose, Gratitude, Grounded. But nothing felt as sturdy as “Roots” did to me.
I’ve always felt connected to tree imagery. Trees are what I doodle when I need to calm down or feel peace. I like drawing the forking of branches as they climb up and out. Roots do the same thing beneath the ground. They are the unseen strength. Roots capture the duality I was feeling: to be grounded and to keep growing.
In a year from now, I want to feel planted. I want to feel the roots growing beneath my feet with more connection to my new home and community and investment into the important relationships in my life. I want to be intentional about becoming the person I want to be and reinforce habits that ground me and prepare me for whatever the future may hold. I want to start building that future.
I don’t know what 2021 will bring or every way my word will show up for me this year, but choosing it makes me feel like I can handle any way the wind blows as long as my heart lives in the roots.
With Love,
Natalie
I’ve always loved ‘To our children, we can give two things: one is roots, the other is wings.’ Wishing you roots and wings. xx