In her latest podcast episode, Brené Brown referenced the Medium article “Your ‘Surge Capacity’ Is Depleted — It’s Why You Feel Awful”
The author, science journalist Tara Haelle, writes:
“In those early months, I, along with most of the rest of the country, was using “surge capacity” to operate, as Ann Masten, PhD, a psychologist and professor of child development at the University of Minnesota, calls it. Surge capacity is a collection of adaptive systems — mental and physical — that humans draw on for short-term survival in acutely stressful situations, such as natural disasters. But natural disasters occur over a short period, even if recovery is long. Pandemics are different — the disaster itself stretches out indefinitely.”
I recommend the whole article (and the podcast episode), but this idea of surging and the author’s initial story of excelling in high-pressure situations resonated with me. I think I do that too. I like a little pressure at work for example. I’m pretty good, I think, to have on hand during a crisis. But that’s speed workouts . . . this (this year? this pandemic? this upcoming decade of uncertainty?) is a freaking ultra-marathon.
It’s an interesting metaphor for me to pick since I’m fascinated by long-distance running. But it’s like we’re collectively trying to sprint in the middle of the race and then realize we have another 75 miles yet to run. The mental load alone can bring us to our knees.
“Research on disaster and trauma focuses primarily on what’s helpful for people during the recovery period, but we’re not close to recovery yet,” the article says and Brené compared it to starting on recovery work while the hurricane is still breaking the windows. We just can’t do both, and yet we’re desperate for the winds to die down and let us clean house.
In the same week, we have confirmed 200,000 dead coworkers tell me it’s feeling back to normal and attending high school football games.
I run past Trump yard signs every morning, and Breonna’s Taylor murder is ruled to be a justified use of force.
There are tropical storms in the south, fires in the west, and rising cases in more places that we can count and it is overwhelming how little some people care.
And we know we can’t stop. We need to get to the polls. Vote. Fight for justice. Keep speaking up. And there’s also daily life — the laundry, the food, the exercise, the career.
Sprint, sprint, spring and then feel guilty for slowing down for even a moment to take drink of water and disconnect.
But this is an ultramarathon. And in ultra’s you settle into your pace, you drink lots of water, you eat pizza at aid stations, and you remind yourself over and over to run the mile you’re in. It’s not a countdown. It’s not even really a race. You just move forward.
With Love,
Natalie