Can I confess something to you?
After I got heatsick on my run last Saturday, I haven’t gone running again. Uffda!
Memorial day weekend was filled with some later nights and extra alcohol than usual, so I gave myself a break. But my routine has also felt disrupted for the last two weeks. I’ve also been making some pretty big life decisions, so I’m willing to cut myself some slack. With my mind racing, sleep was harder, and apparently without my little daily checklist taped to the wall I wasn’t as willing to sacrifice another hour of sleep.
I haven’t taken a five-day break in running since I was recovering from my knee pain in December, so this does feel very uncharacteristic of me. I had intended to correct all of that today though! I even started my run but promptly had to stop because of (gasp) pain. Not run out some soreness because I was taking the opportunity to be a little lazy, but “oh I can’t put weight on my leg without limping right now.” It was not knee pain though, but a new spot (high up on my buttocks if we’re being real) that spoke of not stretching properly or otherwise jarring it wrong this past week.
Instead, I spent that time I was supposed to run rolling my muscles and lifting some weights and I *think* I got out the kink that was giving me pain so I can try again tomorrow and get back to a good routine.
I do like running. Is it funny for how often I write about running that I still need to remind myself that? Things are just so easy not to do, you know? That’s why I was doing it every day for a while and it was working per my favorite Gretchen Rubin saying: it’s easier to do something every day than it is once and a while.
But I don’t want this to be a guilt post either because I haven’t necessarily felt depressed or worse because I’ve dropped the ball on running this week. It’s actually been a good practice in me effectively battling that reflexive negative self-talk. Because you don’t have to be perfect all the time to be strong and valuable or even just fucking happy.
On the other hand I really want to run a marathon this year so . . . better try again tomorrow.
With Love,
Natalie