A year or more ago
I spent twenty dollars
On an electric heating pad
To keep on my lap
What a fine idea
A center of warmth all day long
While I sat and worked through winter
Then, while I sat and worked through summer?
Then, while I moved from my desk to the couch in the evenings?
But then, at last, it can rest all night, rolled up on the chair
Because the lavender heat pack
Goes in the microwave
Then into my bed
I look down one day and see lines on my stomach
Like stretch marks
I wonder, unconcerned,
If this is my skin being burned
Like a frog in slowly boiling water
(Do I care?
I have always liked fire)
But, I leave the heating pad on my chair
And sit on the couch
A blanket, use a blanket
Nevermind, it’s too cold
We talk about addictions
To apps and to caffeine
But no one ever talks about
The damage of a twenty-dollar heating pad
My body may never learn to be warm on its own again
With Love,
Natalie