Words bubble out like poison
And I scribble them in black ink
Over a blank page
They conjure tears like good curses do
And when I look into the dark of myself
I wonder if I’m seeing the truth
Then I get a text
And go for a walk
And look at the glassy water
And try to ask for nothing
(I ask anyway)
This is what fine
Looks like on a Tuesday
With a clean house
And new clothes
And spinach in my smoothies
But I close my eyes
Or rest my mind
And my body is back in Kansas
Sick and waiting
Hopeful and waiting
Anxious and waiting
Until the waiting stopped
And the way my heart dropped
Changed the way I breathe
Changed the way I believe
I couldn’t see the monsters in the trees
So now all the trees look like monsters
Then I take a breath
And write this down
And drink some water
And try to ask for nothing
(I ask anyway)
With Love,
Natalie