You microwave the heat pack
Every hour, stick it between jean-clad thighs
And move it to your stomach
Under your shirt, then under your jeans
As it cools, until your skin leeches the warmth
And you move it to the microwave again
This touch like clockwork
Suits you
(Grounds you)
(Is who you are)
You wake up in the morning
With dreams of past loves behind your eyes
They were dressed in Avatar garb
When they came into your room
Or met you on the stairs
Human hearts as warm as microwaved heat packs
And then they left you, even in the stories you tell yourself
There should be sadness, there was once,
In the emptiness in your bed
But the heartbreak only lingers as a poem,
Its truth fades, and on and on
These dreams like clockwork
Week after week
Year after year
(They used to hurt you)
(They used to kill you)
(Used to)
One told you, ‘in another lifetime’
And you hear the echo
(There are other worlds than these)
And reject it
Because in this lifetime
Because in this world
There are a thousand sunrises
To warm you ahead
And a thousand dings of a microwave
Like clockwork
And a thousand hearts to heat you up
For one, your own heart
First, your own heart
Its beats like clockwork
With Love,
Natalie